Welcome, Fellow Gnerds!

A gnerd [pronounced, "NER-dh"] is a noun.
It is used to name someone who both reads Asimov and can fix a computer virus.

We know every line from Dr. Horrible and the subplots
and backplots of Who.

We lurk around bookshelves.

We listen to Josh Groban and Chameleon Circuit.

We are every Judith, Max and Russell.

We congregate conventions.

We are the next generation.

Saturday, February 27, 2010

List #4

Top Ten Signs You're At A Geek Convention:

10. You hear more Kanye/Taylor impressions during introductions and people NEVER stop thinking its funny.
9. Walking down the hall and overhearing the apparently ongoing conversation about "the pros and cons of  incest" makes you turn your head and realize you're the only one who thinks something is off about that...
8. You see a girl dressed up Sonic the Hedgehog being chased by a banana being chased by a gorilla being chased by an EAGLE and continue on your way.
7. You become so competitive while taking your tests that you actually find yourself giving the poor guy next to you taking Latin Derivatives Level I the evil eye while you fill out the decoy answer sheet to your Mythology Level II papers.
6. You hear The Lonely Island's "Like A Boss" and roughly %5 of the total population is shaking it like Seth Rogen. The other %95 is looking around in confusion, bobbing their heads to the admittedly catchy beat.
5. You shell out $10 for a t-shirt that says "Im On A Boat," on the front, and "Don't you ever forget" on the back...in Latin.
4. The hottest guy here is wearing rainbow shorts, purple suspenders [and not the cool kind], a sweatband, and open-toed sandals with white cotton socks and yelling, "Who wears short shorts? We wear short shorts!"
3. There's a dude here who is Josh Groban's doppleganger. There's also a guy carrying around a giant-sized axe painted red and yellow with black polka-dots.
2. People are competing to see who knows more about obscure Greek and Roman myths, who knows the most Latin bases, ablatives of means and definitions of Latin words and bases of English words, being SOOOOOOPER competitive about it and serious, and you're just concentrating on not pressing your buzzer and saying, "that was easy!"
1. Its the only place where the Kool-Aide Man, Harry Potter, Star Wars, laser guns, oversized banana suits, Star Wars, Transformers, Sonic the Hedgehog, Pikachu, Star Wars, hillbilly farmers, bulldogs, togas, Star Wars, Yoda, the words "praetexta," "illegetimes," and "nauta" on t-shirts, 300 references, I JUST LOST THE GAME-games, Star Wars, ABBA's "Dancing Queen," Texas Hold 'Em, dolls, men dressed as princesses, a ratty old dog being passed around to doers of good, Star Wars, a mural of an alligator made out of tictacs and M&Ms, the Superman insignia standing for something other that the word "super," empty pizza boxes littered in halllways and Miley Cyrus' Party In The USA on speakers can all coexist in the same room and be considered completely normal. Oh, did I mention Star Wars?

Bonus: Someone here is named Spyro Efpraxius. I am going to adopt him.


I am full of wonder, surprise, fantasy, and carbon dioxide, but Im only good for you in small doses.

1 comment:

jessmcfadden said...

Haha your blog is always full of wonderful surprises!! I do enjoy it very much!

Nontostitos salsa is a salsa made by a company other than Tostitos. I've always eaten Tostitos salsa and listed it as such, but lately I've found that it's actually sort of gross! Way too salty. So I've been opting for a fresher, tastier variety:)